I can't believe its been 4 weeks since I injured my ribs. I really thought it was more than that because it has felt like it occurred so long ago. This last week has been the first time where I have been able to do some (and only some) activities but I have lost so much that it feels like I have taken 10 steps back, actually it feels like 50 steps back. As I have been down this road a couple of times, I knew that the road to recovery is more of a mental game than a physical one. Its easy to make excuses and to not even try. Its easy to get discouraged and wonder why are you putting yourself through this. Its easy to say I'm too old for this.
What I learnt from previous injuries is that my body does not heal the way it did when I was younger and that I do need to slowly build things back up again so I don't reinjure it. My brain knows that it will take time, that it will come back faster than before, that this is only a minor set back. Funny how your brain can say all these thing but you really don't believe them and its easier to not do anything about it. So why do we go on? Well, I didn't start this journey to stop it now.
There have been a number of things this week that have helped me get back on track.
reading and memorizing Mastery - one part talks about how everyone is ordinary but its our actions that help us on the road to mastery.
Tai Chi classes - these classes are great alone, but when you have an injury, they help you move and slowly work those areas, gradually building strength and flexibility. I have also found myself relaxing and allowing myself to be "in the moment"
Morning workouts with Mr. Sollinger and Sifu Robinson - I HATE HAVING TO GET UP THAT EARLY but my best days are when we do our workouts together so after, I love that we do this. Everyday I am able to do a bit more.
My Instructors - I can't thank you all enough for letting me work on a backwards shoulder roll and some shrimping and then when I hit my limit, you have only supported me. This allows me to progress at my own pace.
My successes - I had to stop looking back to before the injury occurred and measuring myself. For now, I look back a week and measure from there. This way I can measure my improvements, even if they are small, and right now they are VERY small but they are still going in the right direction.
Now don't get me wrong, I am constantly needing to evaluate myself and ask "Is this just an excuse so I don't need to do something OR is it truly legitimate". I can always find an excuse, but once I realize its an excuse, it is easier to get up and do something.
This is my road from an injury that has actually improved greatly in 4 weeks. For those of you that have been struggling from more significant injuries, my heart goes out to you as I can imagine how hard and dark this road can be but please do not quit. Only when we quit are we truly beaten.
See you on the mats!
Jackie Kohut